Yesterday, 2 April 2010, was day off again. I was spending my time with my family by having lunch together, also with some of my father’s family, especially my father’s mother, grandma. We ate at restaurant Nelayan at Jalan Gudang.

At a same rounded table, we ate, sharing, joking, and it was the time when my grandma’s son met again and having lunch together with grandma. I was sitting in front of my grandma who has already 73 years old. I saw she was having no spirit in talking. She just spent her time by eating and looking anywhere. She was slow in responding her sons’ question. Sometimes she didn’t answer and looks like she didn’t here anything.

She remembered me when I watched some films at DAAI TV channel which shown about old people’s condition. They can repeat their words and questions, be childish, be slow in responding, and I always really sad when watching it. AND it was my first time that I saw my grandma directly in that condition, same like I saw at TV.

When my father was talking to her, I almost drop tears. I feel sad and I try not to see them, but my ears still can here their doings. I feel there was strongly love between them, but there was also sad feeling behind it.

Really, it was my first time seeing really sad feeling of “OLD” from 4 human’s situation (ALIVE, SICK, OLD, AND DEATH) directly.

Is it signing me that I still have strong attachment toward what I see and have until now, especially people that I loved?